Welcome to a space for the spirituality of gay and bisexual men. We have within ourselves the resources for our healing, liberation, and growth. Connecting with each other, we encounter the grace to lay hold of a richer, juicier life. Losing ourselves in deep play, we rediscover the bigger, freer, more joyous selves we're capable of becoming. Here I share my interest in personal and communal ritual, making art that expresses my inner life, and an intentional practice of erotic spirituality.
Wednesday, November 30, 2016
Tuesday, November 29, 2016
In Memory of Oscar Wolfman: Entartete Kunst
The title of Oscar's second solo show, which he raced to complete in 2011 shortly before his death, was "Entartete Kunst." He borrowed the title from shows of "Degenerate Art" mounted by the Nazis in the 1930's as examples of decadence intended to justify National Socialist policies. As he pointed out, those exhibitions paradoxically introduced many viewers to modernist art who had never seen it before. In Oscar's show, he often substituted "Entartete Kunst" for the conventional "Untitled" of many photographs, the above image among them. Lengths of ribbon wrapped around the arms of men in a camp chorus line replace the tefiillin of orthodox Jewish prayer practice.
Monday, November 28, 2016
Sunday, November 27, 2016
In Memory of Oscar Wolfman: Akida
"Akida" is Hebrew for "binding." The word is often associated specifically with the Binding of Isaac in Genesis 22. Oscar evoked the episode in multiple photographs.
Saturday, November 26, 2016
Friday, November 25, 2016
In Memory of Oscar Wolfman: Jeremiah
“I’m on gay cruising sites every morning,” said
Oscar in an interview in connection with one of his solo exhibtions. “The advantage of the sites I use is that men show photos of
themselves nude, so I can determine if they will be suitable. For the same
reason, the other main place I find models is at the gym, where locker rooms
and showers become audition venues. There are always a lot of muscular older
men with long white beards in biblical tales, so if anyone reading this looks
like an Old Testament prophet, contact me.”
Thursday, November 24, 2016
Wednesday, November 23, 2016
Tuesday, November 22, 2016
In Memory of Oscar Wolfman
"Jael and Sisera." The title of Oscar's first solo exhibition, "Midrash," referred to the Jewish interpretive practice of filling in the material missing from Biblical narrative but required to make full sense of the story. This photograph offers a midrash on Judges 4:4-22.
Monday, November 21, 2016
In Memory of Oscar Wolfman (d. November 21, 2011)
Among Oscar's most memorable photographs was a suite of four images of a man dancing nude in a tallit (prayer shawl).
Sunday, November 20, 2016
Yahrzeit: In Memory of Oscar Wolfman (1955-2011)
Five years
ago on November 21, we lost a brilliant gay outsider artist whose work, as he
was fond of saying, was “too queer for Jews and too Jewish for queers.” It’s a
great line, but the reception of his two solo shows, “Midrash,” in 2010, and “Entartete
Kunst,” in 2011 just weeks before his death, witnessed to the power his lush, often
cryptic, sometimes outrageous photography held for audiences that included
queers, Jews, Jewish queers, and fellow travellers looking for our own Promised
Land.
The only son
of Holocaust survivors, raised in Montreal, a dancer, choreographer, chef,
graduate student, and teacher, he came to photography late. His deep knowledge
of European art, and especially of seventeenth-century of Italian painting; his
immersion in Torah and Talmud; his inexhaustible love for the beauty of men and
his provocative, shame-deflating celebration of their erotic energy; his wry
sense of camp, which was at once just Jewish and just queer enough; a luminous
faith in the holiness of the body, and of embodied pleasure and desire--all these emerge in work that those of us
who remember him for his brilliant, generous, quirky, courtly self are
determined will not pass into oblivion.
Traditional
commemoration of the Yarhzeit--the anniversay of a loved one’s death--is made
by reciting the Kaddish, the prayer on behalf of the dead, and by lighting a
candle that will burn for twenty-four hours. It’s reckoned among the Orthodox
according to the Hebrew calendar. But as queer a Jew and as Jewish a queer as
Oscar was, I can’t believe he’d object to this alternative commemoration: the
posting here of one of his images each day for the next month, from tomorrow
until the Winter Solstice on December 21.
GLORIFIED AND SANCTIFIED BE THE HOLY ONE'S GREAT NAME, THROUGHOUT
THE WORLD CREATED ACCORDING TO THE
DIVINE WILL. ESTABLISHED BE GOD'S KINGDOM IN YOUR LIFETIME AND DURING YOUR DAYS,
AND WITHIN THE LIFE OF ALL HUMANKIND, SPEEDILY AND SOON, AND LET US SAY, AMEN.
MAY GOD'S GREAT NAME BE BLESSED FOREVER AND TO ALL ETERNITY.
BLESSED AND PRAISED, GLORIFIED AND EXALTED, EXTOLLED AND
HONORED, ADORED AND LAUDED BE THE NAME OF THE HOLY ONE, BLESSED BE THAT ONE
BEYOND ALL BLESSINGS AND HYMNS, PRAISES AND CONSOLATIONS THAT ARE EVER SPOKEN
IN THE WORLD, AND LET US SAY, AMEN.
MAY THERE BE ABUNDANT PEACE FROM HEAVEN AND LIFE FOR US AND
FOR ALL MEN, AND LET US SAY AMEN.
MAY GOD WHO CREATES PEACE IN THE CELESTIAL
HEIGHTS CREATE PEACE FOR US AND FOR ALL THE WORLD, AND LET US SAY, AMEN.
Saturday, November 12, 2016
Repair of the Soul and Repair of the World
I haven’t
stopped reeling since the horror of last Tuesday night began to unfold, as it
became clear that a vindictive, inarticulate narcissist with the moral compass
of a rhesus monkey, and the qualifications of my cat, will become the next president
of the United States.
It’s cold
comfort that by the time the count is complete, Donald Trump will probably be
behind Hilary Clinton by well over a million popular votes. The greed, social
injustice, and ecological pillage that he promises to unleash will surely
match and probably outstrip that of the Reagan years. And Reagan, at least, that
simple-minded hack now canonized by the American right, at least had two terms
as governor of California behind him before he assumed the most powerful office
in the world. The flames of hatred and division that Trump fanned as he cut his
campaign swath through the body politic will engulf for years the glimmers of the
more just and tolerant society that we might instead have evolved into.
This is no
time to retreat into a shell of private serenity and personal fulfilment. It’s
not a time to collapse in despair. Neither is it a time to lash out in fury.
It’s a time
to recognize that the only way to heal the soul is to repair the world, and
the only way to heal the world is to repair the soul. The most authentic
foundation for action is contemplation, as Franciscan Richard Rohr reminds us.
And the litmus test that our spiritual practice isn’t mere self-delusion is
conversely that it bears fruit in the world.
It’s a time
to deepen our awareness through spiritual practice that our lives are not
restricted to our small, isolated selves alone, but are nourished by the web of
connections through which our life flows in and out of ourselves, in and out of
each other, in and out of all creatures. And it’s a time to live out that
awareness by building and sustaining networks of solidarity and action that will keep hope
alive through dark years that we’re almost certainly facing.
It’s a time
to donate to organizations that struggle for justice and dignity of the marginalized--to the American Civil Liberties Union, to the Southern Poverty Law Center, to Planned Parenthood, to a dozen others. Till
we can’t afford to give more.
It’s a time
to volunteer one’s talents and energy.
It’s a time
to help settle refugees and to protect them from xenophobia.
It’s a time
to participate in peaceful demonstrations.
It’s a time
to pour out into the streets in solidarity with the victims of hate crimes.
It’s a time
to work for positive change at more local levels, since the federal
government has failed us all. It’s some comfort that progressive measures on a
range of issues passed at state and local levels on Tuesday: the minimum wage
was raised, transit projects were funded, possession of small amounts of
marijuana for personal use was decriminalized; a ballot measure for a
single-payer health-care system in Colorado went down to resounding
defeat, but at least it was on the ballot. More such measures will surely be on state
ballots as Congress dismantles the Affordable Care Act.
It’s a time
for queer men of spirit to recognize that what’s done to our Muslim brothers
and sisters, our Hispanic brothers and sisters, our black brothers and sisters,
our impoverished brothers and sisters, our trans brothers and sisters, our
indigenous brothers and sisters, is done
to us, and to act accordingly. It’s a time to remember that we are the
guardians of the Earth who is our Mother and of whom we remain a part, and to
act accordingly.
It’s a time
to remember that every time we make love, we win.
Wednesday, November 2, 2016
So Not a 10
If you’re of
my generation, you almost certainly remember Dudley Moore in “10,” playing the
middle-aged guy who’s convinced he’ll find every fulfilment life has to offer
if can only get into bed with Bo Derek. The funniest scene in the movie, and
the one nearly everyone vividly remembers (how could you not?) is the two of
them alone at last as the fantasy dissolves into contretemps while they
negotiate positions around the clattering beads of her hair extensions and
continuous interruptions to restart the stereo, because she can only climax to
Ravel’s “Bolero.”
The craziness
of our erotic fantasies lies at least partly in that we imagine they’re about
connecting with other people. Then we connect, and realize that on a scale of 1
to 10, where 10 is a perfect fit between what we’d dreamed about and what’s
happening, being face to face with this man/with these men is, like, so not a
10. It’s not at all what we imagined. Instead, it’s real, waking life, in the
presence of someone else whose inner world and whose fantasies are as complex
as our own, and as unfamiliar as another country. Therapist Hedy Schleifer
talks about crossing the bridge to the world of the other, “carrying only my
passport in a clear plastic bag.”
The moments
of disillusionment that ensue are critical, and precious. They’re a wakeup call
from self-absorbed (and self-deluding) slumber. We can slap the alarm off and
go back to sleep--or in this case, back off in disappointment and go on
dreaming the impossible wet dream. We can go on sleeping our way through a
dozen more sexual encounters, or a hundred, or a thousand, thinking the next
one will offer it all, whatever the fuck “it” is.
Or else, we
can begin to recognize that all longing is only imperfectly answerable, and the
real magic starts when we fall more deeply into the encounter that’s here
before us, now.
In the light
of another’s difference, paradoxically we come to know ourselves better. We can
start to look at our fantasies themselves to ask what they mean, where they
come from, why we find them so compelling. And in the eyes and arms of one who
isn’t ourselves, we can come to feel the presence of One who isn’t ourselves.
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