I had the privilege of spending the weekend before last encouraging ten men enrolled in a mindful masturbation workshop to pay deeper attention to what they've known, on some level, all along: that we possess within ourselves enormous capacities for pleasure and fulfillment. That we have access to a deeper realm where body and soul are one--where desire can blossom into wisdom and compassion.
Why do we need to be guided deeper into the erotic treasures we already possess?
Because for decades we've been told that sex is something we "get" rather than an energy that circulates within us and between us.
Because we need a secure and welcoming space to release the inhibitions of a lifetime.
Because we need to practice acceptance and generosity toward others in order genuinely to practice it toward ourselves.
Because we need reminders to slow down and breathe, to move our bodies, to make sound, to explore subtleties of touch, in order to become conscious of what we take for granted. Because it takes years to unlearn what many if not most of us learned at the age of fifteen--a fast, silent, tense, breathless pump-and-dump.
Because we need the experience of a community to tell us, "I see you. I've got you. You're safe. You're worthy. You're irreplaceable and sacred. This is your birthright. And sharing it is sheer joy."
Photo by Andrew Graham
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